My 4 top tips for becoming Fearless (or improving self-confidence)
Many people Ive spoken too or books I’ve read swear by visualisation. Visualising yourself as someone who you want to be/look/have is a very powerful tool. I did this when I was on my yoga teacher training exactly 4 years ago today and I visualised how I wanted my business to look even down to the finer details and it’s exactly how I imagined now. I used to date a very well known kick boxing world champion and I always asked him about his success and what he did to prepare before going into the ring? For weeks, he said, coming up to the fight he would spend time visualising the outcome, winning! He visualises hearing his name being read out as winner, feeling what the belt would feel like in his hands, the weight and texture, what it would feel inside to win the fight- and hold that feeling inside of him for a while.
Whenever I have an important meeting, audition or event, I spend a few moments watching myself go through my “ideal scenario” and outcome and 9.9 times out of 10 it usually goes to plan if not better than expected. I also read in my reiki bible that visualising situations and wanting a positive outcome and energy surrounding you, you can use the power symbol and surround yourself with powerful reiki energy. I also do this.
This is a huge one for me, positive affirmations have a massive impact on people. Believing in yourself and others creates this energy of confidence which is contagious (Paul your amazing at skiing (truth) you can handle that black run I believe in you) A lot of the time my private students believe that they can’t do something and when I tell them they can they look at me in disbelief like love asked them to do the impossible! Then once they try, Continue to carry out the movement to their surprise! What I notice about myself is I’m a “I CAN DO THAT” person, I’ve noticed myself that when I’ve got something challenging ahead I pep talk myself – I boost myself. Going down those red runs snowboarding last weekend, I’ve got videos of me saying, “Come on you can do this”, “you’ve got this”. Or to my friends amusement a common one is “I’m gonna be awesome at that”….My friends all laugh at me and tease me about my modesty or lack of. But when I actually achieve my goals they turn to me and say, “How do you bloody do it?” And the answer is simply I just believe I can. “Speak things into existence friends”.
Getting comfortable with the uncomfortable
As we all know growth never comes from within the comfort zone. How will we know what we are capable of unless we try new, harder or different things? Every time we try and succeed our self-esteem/belief and confidence in our abilities grows. Therefore as does our self confidence. Its always good to try new things which keeps life fresh, fun and interesting. Also studies show that the older generation that learn to use new technologies such as iPhones, computers, tablets are less likely to develop dementia/Alzheimer’s because it’s keeping the brain active and up to date.
Only your opinion matters
Who’s the one person you live with your entire life? Obviously yourself! So that needs to be the best relationship you can have! Living your life through other peoples standards/opinions and expectations of you, will have you running around in circles and eventually have you forgetting who YOU really are. They say if you have haters then your obviously doing something right- and I agree with this. At some point you will need to stand up for who you are, what you believe or what you expect- and not everyone is going to like it or you. If you go round pleasing others, guess who will be the one who’s unhappy in the end? YOU!
Learn what healthy boundaries are, but most importantly learn what YOUR boundaries are and stick to them. Unsure of what your boundaries are? Listen to how you feel when someone does something to you. They might have violated one of your boundaries. If so, tell them in a polite way how you feel so you don’t carry that negative energy with you- and this also educates the other person for future reference when dealing with you or someone else, in most cases they will appreciate your honesty and it will have intact helped them.